Can’t Stay Away..

I went on blogging hiatus exactly a week back and I can’t keep myself away from writing. So. Hey!! I am back after an unsuccessful attempt to keep away from my blog.

Exams are approaching and I am freaking out. I am finished with my physics and chemistry practicals.

How did they go Rav?

Good. But I messed up my physics viva, I answered only one because I had a mini panic attack. Chemistry practicals were GREAT. Though in the beginning I was going out of my mind and was scared because I accidentally threw salt on the front page of my answer sheet and created mess. I was complaining in my head as to how I always attract bad luck and no matter how much I try I am still going to be doomed. And then all of a sudden I had an enlightening moment. I did mess up my front page but hey nothing happened to my details on the front page which was very crucial since I won’t be getting another booklet, so luck may still be on my side. I promised myself I won’t get panicked this time and I didn’t, as a result my chemistry viva went extremely well.

I started a journal after getting lots of inspiration from JUST A BLANK SPACE.

Currently I am writing pre finals, day after tomorrow I have chemistry and I didn’t prepare anything. This reminds me a quote from Percy Jackson.

deadlines

-RAV

Writer’s Block

*Originally posted on ‘And Then There Was Rav’*

It’s funny how I randomly come up with ideas during very bizarre moments but when I actually sit down and start to write I am totally confused. For example

While Rav is studying for physics miraculously creative Rav comes alive

Creative Rav: Hey Rav! How about we write a post on why we think the universe can be a humongous brain.

Rav: Oh my god! How ingenious of you! We should definitely do that but in a while, I have to complete this chapter.

While she is reading Looking for Alaska

Creative Rav: Hey I have this new idea where we will write about what the labyrinth that Alaska is talking about means.

Rav: Hell yeah we should totally do that but let me finish this chapter.

While she is getting worried on how she will pay her huge tuition fees if she gets an admission in a university

Creative Rav: Dude you gotta listen to this one. How about we write a post on what will the world be like without money.

Rav: Wow! That will be awesome but let me finish worrying.

While She is about to fall asleep

Creative Rav: Oh you are about to fall asleep let me share with you some amazing ideas that you will definitely forget tomorrow.

Rav: *Wakes up next day* Hey creative Rav I remember you telling me some ideas wha-what were they?

*no answer*

While having a shower

Creative Rav: Write about what life means, how you want to change the world, counterstereotypes, female astronomers, a poem on feminism (they were many more ideas but, yeah you guessed it right, I don’t them remember now)

Rav: Okay after I finish having a shower

While procrastinating

Creative Rav: How about-

Rav the procrastinator: fine, in a while.

So after I finish all my work and start to write about the idea I had that day *KA BOOM* Writer’s Block. It is so frustrating.

(Creative Rav: How about we make a post on how we can overcome writer’s block

Rav: Oh yeah! But after I finish this post.

Rav the procrastinator: Or maybe some other day)

But one day I am going to write posts on all these ideas.

-RAV

Again

*Originally Posted On ‘And Then There Was Rav’*

I failed, again.

Today morning around 3:30AM the university admission results were announced. And yeah, I was denied. It sucks to say that out loud. I was so dejected when I saw the word denied, bold on the screen. I knew there was a high chance of me getting denied because I messed up with my SAT real bad. But there was a small part of me that was thinking otherwise. Now that I think about it again the small part was actually the stronger part.

I started to cry and cried myself to sleep (a very bad mistake I realized, I am hella tired now). Morning I got up around 9 and I decided I had enough of moping around, feeling depressed, looking sick, walking with droopy shoulders, thinking life has all control over me and I just can’t do anything about it(which I have been doing for 3 months now). I had enough.

I am in charge of my life. I am not going to just randomly float around feeling powerless. I am going to apply to two other unis and concentrate on my board exams. Probably I will be taking a year off after I finish my 12th if I don’t get into the universities I like.

No matter what I am not giving up.

-RAV

Letting Go

*Originally Posted On ‘And Then There Was Rav’*

letting-go

I still remember it was 4 years back when we all started to become close and as the days progressed we became a tight knit family. It was two years ago when the path that we walked together diverged. At the crossroads, we promised we would stay in touch, we told each other “I will miss you” and then each of us chose a different road.

I walked down the unfamiliar path as days became weeks, weeks became months, months became years, real conversations became chats, chats became awkward, people became past, and memories became distant. But I still held on to you all, hoping one day we would meet again, hoping we would again have those conversations of everything and anything .

As the memories faded, I desperately held onto them because losing them would mean losing you all. I waited and hoped you would come back only to realize you all have moved on with your lives. I felt betrayed. I silently cursed you all for abandoning me and my hopes.  How selfish of me and I am really sorry about that.

Now I have decided to let you free, free from my clutches because I realized sometimes it’s okay to let go of hopeless friendships, even though you love those people and holding on to you all is only making me weak and vulnerable and you my dearest, you don’t even have the slightest clue of what I am going through.

I am letting you all go but I can never forget you, for I have memories I hold close to my heart and you were all part of them.

-RAV

Where Have I been?

I dunno what happened to me but I just wanted to create a new blog. And I did create one it was called ‘And Then There Was Rav’. I have been using it for more than a week but then I wanted to come back. I have no idea why I want keep changing my blogs. Wait I get it! I thought I was not happy with this blog when in truth I got bored of it. It is frustrating how easily I get bored of things.

I promise no more changing blogs. I am going to stick to this one now.

But there are a few changes I made to this blog.

  1. My name: I am changing my name from Ashlynn to Rav (pronounced as Reyv). When I was creating a new blog I was coming up with random names for myself it was then I came up with Rav and since then I have been fascinated with the name.
  2. My About Page: I created a new about page for the new blog and I want to continue using it.

I am also going to post the posts I have posted on ‘And then there was Rav’

Sorry for being such a huge jerk.

-RAV